To: My Superwoman

할머니 (Halmoni) - The Korean word for Grandmother. A true beauty.

Dear Halmoni,

Strength is the first thing that comes into my mind when I think of you. You are definitely one of the strongest women that I know. A real superwoman. Growing up as a shy little girl, I always admired the fearless nature that you naturally had. Arriving in the United States as an immigrant must have been a terrifying situation for you. But, you refused to allow that fear to stand in your way. You kept pursuing your dream to live comfortably and made sure that our needs were being met. You helped raised six lovely grandchildren into who we are now and always made sure that we were being fed, kept warm, and maintaining our health. Sacrifice and unconditional love were what we received from you. I miss going into your bedroom during the evenings and asking if you wanted to play board games with Da-Hye and I. I miss the times when you always accompanied us to walk back home from school and made us feel protected. One of my fondest childhood memories was playing badminton with you and Da-Hye in front of our old Eagle Canyon apartment complex. I was only nine years old. Even though I kept missing to hit the birdie, you always encouraged me to keep trying and eventually, I improved my skills in badminton. Another favorite early memory of mine is when you used to watch Sora Unnie, Tony Oppa, and I play and swim in their backyard while Da-Hye was still an infant sitting in her little baby swing. Lastly, visiting Joshua and David in Arizona with you was also memorable. I can still remember the time when we all went out to view the local scenic mountains. It was such a beautiful day.

Fast forward now to March 2018. The house is slightly quiet and it somehow feels empty. Even now as a young woman, you always told me to pursue my goals and do what makes me feel the happiest. And to not live under other people's expectations. All I want to say is that I love you so much. And that I'm sorry for all of the immature fits that I threw in the past. Although it is so difficult for me to say good-bye, I just want you to know that because of you, I'm cherishing and realizing how important family is. I'm more aware of Mom and Dad's health now and if they're in need of something, I try to be there to help them out as much as I can. I want them to live long, happy, and healthy lives. A part of me is still that little girl with the huge red-rimmed glasses who loved holding your hand and taking quiet walks with you. I still feel that you're spiritually around me. I continue to have dreams about you as well. I'm looking at this as not saying a final farewell, but more of a see-you-later. I yearn for that time for when I get to see you again. As I grow older and may develop a family of my own someday, I want to share my memories of you with them. You have made such a huge impact on my life. I just wish that I could have offered more to you back. And lastly, I thank you. Thank you for being my protector and rock throughout the years and watching all of us grow. You gave so much, but asked for so little in return. I miss you and wish you were here everyday.

Love,

Ji-Hye